I read all of this with that quiet lump you get when love and hurt are standing in the same room... and neither one knows where to look. The line between not accusing anyone and still letting the child speak is so tender and so hard, and I really respect how carefully you held both.
I love your reflection in this poem, Odel. I understand both your side of it and your mom's. I have my own relationship with my mother that is not always good, but I love her dearly. I know you love your mom dearly also and writing this must not have been easy.
I still have Lot of grudges with my mom Till today as I always feel she never understood me for what all I do … she is biased to my younger sister !! But I’m getting a hold of it and feeling little fine about it …
Thank you very much for reading and sharing, Ambika !
I can understand what you feel. I think it’s one of the feelings a lot of older siblings face in a family. Maybe because the parents thing they are stronger, very often we see them more biased to the younger. This can create an imbalance and as you mentioned lead to a lot of grudges within the family. Perhaps se will never understand you, but this is less important. We don’t need others to understand us, we need to understand ourselves, even though it’s always pleasant when they do understand us.
It’s good to know you’re getting a hold of it, that can help you make peace with yourself and perhaps with that part of your mother.
Odel, good evening.As I grew older, I also came to understand that my parents had their own circumstances and struggles. But that does not mean the hurt I felt as a child simply disappears.That is why I felt this poem was not written to blame your mother, but to acknowledge your true feelings and bring peace to your own heart. 😇
Oh this was such a hard read . The naivety of your mother meaning no harm and probably telling the story for laughs . She had no idea of the power of her words and the destruction that lay behind each of them. But she was a good mother to raise a child with the empathy that you have with the self awareness and social awareness that you see that she never meant harm . That doesn’t negate what happened it just negates that fact that there was no malice behind the actions 💔💔💔
That what made it difficult to me to face that part of my past. Even little I could see that she loves us, but she was hurting me. I saw how sensitive she is for us among anything. She cared too much sometimes. Back then, I couldn’t understand that. I didn’t even know how what to feel for her until I realized that recognizing the hurt doesn’t erase the love she has for me nor the love I feel for her.
Thank you Leonorra for reading this and for your thoughtful words. that means a lot ✨✨🫶🏼
My mom used to threaten to kill herself, but the only thing keeping her from doing it, was her kids. My childhood was not the best, and when my parents are not feeling well, they apologize to me for being a bad parent. what do I say in return? "It's old, it's the past. We can't go backwards and fix any of it. I understand that you were a hurt human, never having had the opportunity to process any of your own trauma. I forgive you, so please, forgive yourself too."
I’m grateful you shared this with us. There’s so much maturity on that and the fact that your parents used to apologize to you shows that they were just struggling, perhaps dealing with things they couldn’t understand. Indeed, we can not change the past, a mature look at it, can only change the way we carry it. And sometimes that’s what we need to understand ourselves and our family, to grow and to heal ✨☺️🥰
I recognize that my dad just couldn't relate to me as his child because he had step sons he prioritized due to his new wife. I was like the step child who didn't get attention. It hurt, but it was all he knew to do.
I’m sorry for what you had to live back then. I can only imagine that, the pain, the hurt. I hope that you know it was not your fault. When we got hurt sometimes, it becomes our responsibility to heal ourselves and move one.
"There are words we do not write because we have something to teach, but because we need to breathe." The distinction between writing as wisdom and writing as release is something every honest writer eventually discovers. The child simply needed to speak — and you gave him the room to do it. Really moving piece. Honored to share the Mini-Zine with you.
Not everything exists to teach something, sometimes it’s just a soul trying to move on in public. Paradoxically, we end up helping others that way sometimes.
Thank you for joining the Mirror Room and welcome 🤗
I read all of this with that quiet lump you get when love and hurt are standing in the same room... and neither one knows where to look. The line between not accusing anyone and still letting the child speak is so tender and so hard, and I really respect how carefully you held both.
It sure hard to process. Hard not to chose a side over the other. But in the end, they are both real and perhaps they can sit together for a while.
Thank you, Asuka-Sama for reading and sharing your thoughts
I love your reflection in this poem, Odel. I understand both your side of it and your mom's. I have my own relationship with my mother that is not always good, but I love her dearly. I know you love your mom dearly also and writing this must not have been easy.
Indeed, it hasn't been easy yo read. But the outcome was good.
I'm glad you loved it. Thank you, Sattie.
I still have Lot of grudges with my mom Till today as I always feel she never understood me for what all I do … she is biased to my younger sister !! But I’m getting a hold of it and feeling little fine about it …
Thank you very much for reading and sharing, Ambika !
I can understand what you feel. I think it’s one of the feelings a lot of older siblings face in a family. Maybe because the parents thing they are stronger, very often we see them more biased to the younger. This can create an imbalance and as you mentioned lead to a lot of grudges within the family. Perhaps se will never understand you, but this is less important. We don’t need others to understand us, we need to understand ourselves, even though it’s always pleasant when they do understand us.
It’s good to know you’re getting a hold of it, that can help you make peace with yourself and perhaps with that part of your mother.
Thanks Odel , I think my study of astrology helped me to understand this …
Odel, good evening.As I grew older, I also came to understand that my parents had their own circumstances and struggles. But that does not mean the hurt I felt as a child simply disappears.That is why I felt this poem was not written to blame your mother, but to acknowledge your true feelings and bring peace to your own heart. 😇
Thank you, Keiichiro 🫶🏼
You’re right. Understanding them doesn’t make the pain we’ve experienced disappear. It offers space to accept and make peace with that part of us.
Oh this was such a hard read . The naivety of your mother meaning no harm and probably telling the story for laughs . She had no idea of the power of her words and the destruction that lay behind each of them. But she was a good mother to raise a child with the empathy that you have with the self awareness and social awareness that you see that she never meant harm . That doesn’t negate what happened it just negates that fact that there was no malice behind the actions 💔💔💔
That what made it difficult to me to face that part of my past. Even little I could see that she loves us, but she was hurting me. I saw how sensitive she is for us among anything. She cared too much sometimes. Back then, I couldn’t understand that. I didn’t even know how what to feel for her until I realized that recognizing the hurt doesn’t erase the love she has for me nor the love I feel for her.
Thank you Leonorra for reading this and for your thoughtful words. that means a lot ✨✨🫶🏼
This resonates deeply for me, thank you for sharing 💖
Thank you so much for reading, Rhonda ! I’m gad it resonates with you ☺️
My mom used to threaten to kill herself, but the only thing keeping her from doing it, was her kids. My childhood was not the best, and when my parents are not feeling well, they apologize to me for being a bad parent. what do I say in return? "It's old, it's the past. We can't go backwards and fix any of it. I understand that you were a hurt human, never having had the opportunity to process any of your own trauma. I forgive you, so please, forgive yourself too."
I love this writing. Thank you.
Thank you so much, Annika!
I’m grateful you shared this with us. There’s so much maturity on that and the fact that your parents used to apologize to you shows that they were just struggling, perhaps dealing with things they couldn’t understand. Indeed, we can not change the past, a mature look at it, can only change the way we carry it. And sometimes that’s what we need to understand ourselves and our family, to grow and to heal ✨☺️🥰
Loved reading your poem. It put things in perspective.
Thank you very much ☺️😊
I recognize that my dad just couldn't relate to me as his child because he had step sons he prioritized due to his new wife. I was like the step child who didn't get attention. It hurt, but it was all he knew to do.
Thank you, Jonijae.
I’m sorry for what you had to live back then. I can only imagine that, the pain, the hurt. I hope that you know it was not your fault. When we got hurt sometimes, it becomes our responsibility to heal ourselves and move one.
Sending you a big hug 🫂 😊
"There are words we do not write because we have something to teach, but because we need to breathe." The distinction between writing as wisdom and writing as release is something every honest writer eventually discovers. The child simply needed to speak — and you gave him the room to do it. Really moving piece. Honored to share the Mini-Zine with you.
Thank you very much, Jacob ! That means a lot !
Not everything exists to teach something, sometimes it’s just a soul trying to move on in public. Paradoxically, we end up helping others that way sometimes.
Thank you for joining the Mirror Room and welcome 🤗
holding your poem and you with so much care..........with you
Thank you very much 🫂✨❤️
we love them: yet we hate them.
Such a paradox! We can choose to understand and make peace with ourselves!
Thank you Qamr !