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Aaliya's avatar

Your story is so heartfelt and deeply moving, I felt every word, and resonates with me. It’s touching to see how your father’s intentions came from a place of love, even if they led to unintended consequences. Your reflection on this is both insightful and heartfelt.

Odel Asseille's avatar

Thank you very much, Aaliya!

It’s something common that love is blind in some ways. When people are convinced they are acting by love, very often they can’t see the consequences on their loved ones in the long term.

Sincerely Seb's avatar

This is a very interesting insight into you as a person.

Odel Asseille's avatar

Thank you, brother

Sattie R's avatar

I know what it's like to grow up in a family where we weren't allowed to choose for ourselves or make decisions for ourselves.

Odel Asseille's avatar

Thank you very much, Sattie. It’s something hard indeed

Jay Allen Ford's avatar

The shoe scene shows that true autonomy goes beyond simply saying “It’s up to you.” Making choices is a skill that develops through practice, guidance, and a supportive environment where imperfect decisions are okay.

You were denied that apprenticeship and then mocked for your first attempt. The lesson was no longer merely “I paid too much.” It became “When people see me choose, my mistakes will be used against me.” That makes your comparison to learning to walk especially fitting: confidence grows because falling is permitted, not because the first step is flawless.

What was the first decision you made that you eventually accepted as imperfect, yet still felt proud to call your own?

Odel Asseille's avatar

Thank you very much, Jay.

I like the way you complete this reflection, without a safe environment to learn, it becomes hard to grow. Instead of learning from our mistakes, we feel shame for them and somehow force to hide them.

I don’t really remember the first decision that was completely mine, I made a lot things my own over the time but most of them was influenced by people around me. If there is one thing that, it would be writing and publishing. What about you, do you remember your first decision that was completely yours?